Nikon D300 auto focus dead

Well today sucks. I picked up my relatively new Nikon D300 and went to take some shots and boom, no auto focus. At all. I tried all my lenses and all combinations of settings, reset the entire camera and still no dice. On top of that it appears to not be changing metering modes or how many AF sensors it uses when I change the lever. I have my old D70s but it is nothing like shooting with the D300. I looked on the internet at various Nikon user forums and it seems to be a problem at least some other people are having. It's still under warranty but Nikon is telling me there is a 3 week turnaround.

Ugh. Needless to say, I'm furious.